Do you remember which window she would look out of? The one in her classroom which overlooked the ground? The one that somehow always gave her hope? If not, here is a little recap:
Looking out of the window
So years changed, classes changed. And she moved up the ladder of education leaving her window behind. There was no window this year as her classroom stood right next to another building, so all she could see was the wall. She got caught up with her work and her life, and she forgot to do some things which were very important to her. She forgot to look at the rain, to smile, to dance, to talk to a lot of people and the worst was that she forgot to write. She had this little blog in a tiny corner of this wonderful site called wordpress and she forgot about that.
As things kept getting worse, she found that many doors were being shut to her face. There was one last door that had been open, which was slowly closing as well. She was so alone in a room full of closed doors that she would weep endlessly and sleep came to her only in installments.
Then this one day, when she was all alone at home studying (as usual), she had to run to her window to shut it, to keep this thing called ‘rain’ out of her room. When she was doing so, she just happened to glance outside accidentally. And then she saw – trees and parks, apartments and roads, dogs and birds, even the beach on the horizon – all looking so beautiful as the rain pattered down on them.
That is when she realized that there was always a window! A tiny window with some thing to show you or to give you some hope, if only you were willing to take it! It was true that when a door closes a window opens up in its place. All she needed was a little perspective.
She looked out of her window, desperate for some inspiration or some sign that it would all get better. But for the first time all she saw was the barren ground. She realized that all this while she had just seen things which weren’t actually there and motivated herself all the while proclaiming that the window did it for her. After all, it was only a window – a mild lifeless object which couldn’t help her in any way. She wondered why she had to have this realization just then when she felt life was going to pieces. She had been cooped up in her own world for too long. She now felt like she didn’t even know what was going on in the world around her. Her friends had made new friends and they didn’t need her anymore. Every time she went out with them she felt horribly left out. She wasn’t being able to do what she had set out to do. She wasn’t being able to accomplish her goal and was facing possible failure for the very first time in life. The one thing she had was now no longer her’s. All she could do was write, but her writing too was getting monotonous. And now.. her window. She looked out of the window yet again, her moist eyes desperately hunting for a friendly hand or an inspiration of some sort.
She wondered why she was late for class on the very first day. It seemed to be a trend for her. She ran through the halls hoping she would be let in. Thankfully she was! She sat in her seat breathless from all that running and suddenly there was a huge rush of wind. She turned around and saw – the window!! Of course! How could she forget her beloved window? Which overlooked the school grounds. She saw it all as if through new eyes – the birds, the trees, the little boys, the city… ah!!! She had missed that sight. She watched as some of the boys sat under the trees, some others walked around in two’s and three’s, while the remaining few fought the heat and played football. The wind was a great respite from the heat for all of them – inside and outside the classroom. She smiled and imagined having a small old fashioned picnic on the grounds. Wow! She really had missed looking out of the window!
As she sat, looking out of her window for the last time, she thought of all the times something outside that window had comforted her. All the realizations she had had, just by looking out of the window. There was the ground, the trees and the city on the horizon. She knew that when college ended this would probably be one of the things she would miss the most. Who would have imagined that just one window would have inspired so much in her, that she would create a separate section for it on her blog. Oh boy! It would be one long month, without day dreaming beside her favorite window.
The semester is coming to an end, and ‘looking out of the window’ is having a small break till college reopens in November.
She looked outside the window and noticed the moist ground, the slightly wet trees and that smell you get from the ground after a shower of rain. She smiled and wondered how things could change so fast. When she had left for lunch the ground was absolutely dry – as if it were a parched throat in need of water. And in thirty minutes it looked so beautiful. There had barely been a shower, for the amount of rain that had poured was not much. Yet, that little rain was enough to transform the ground. She realized that it was the same with life. Life needed a little shower to bloom. On the previous day, she had thrown party for a good friend and the day had gone splendidly. But when she reached home she was faced with a different atmosphere. She had to make a choice, and her career depended on it. But it was so difficult for her to choose that she couldn’t sleep well that night. As a result, she had been grumpy all morning. After snapping at a lot of people, she finally calmed down after lunch. That was when she realized that, though she still hadn’t come to a conclusion, all she needed was a little unexpected shower in her life. and her frown would be turned upside down again. Life was unexpected, and the lows would come along with the highs. All she had to do was wait.. She smiled and continued to look out of the window.
She came in, late as usual, threw her bag on the desk and sat down. She looked out of the window so that no one would see the tears she was trying to hold back. After a while one tear slowly trickled down her cheek. At the same time a cool breeze blew across her face. She looked outside the window again. She thought about what had happened. She had been talking to a friend about life in the small town she lived and life in the outside world. The friend kept telling her how many opportunities she was missing being cooped up in this small town. They kept talking about all the things they could do in a bigger city. The freedom they would get, the open-minded people they would be around, the facilities they would be provided with and basically the standard of living they could experience. The jobs and pay scale, the malls, the parks, the infrastructure, etc. But she kept arguing that this was the best place in the world for her. She had lived here all her life and she intended to live here for the rest of her life. She still had a lot to discover in this small town of her’s. She loved it with all her heart and did not want to live anywhere else. But the friend then asked her to imagine what her life would have been like if she had grown up in a bigger city. She asked her to think about the things she had missed. She thought back to her childhood and saw all the things she had, but then she saw all the things she could have had. Wouldn’t she want her adult life at least to have all the opportunities she possibly could have? The friend then went away. She was still in a trance. She heard the first bell go. She got up and started walking to class. She realized that her life could have been much more than it already was. For the first time in her life, she hated her town for the things it lacked. That was when she had come into the class – frustrated.
The wind became stronger. The trees on the ground started shaking and all of a sudden it started raining. The rain was so furious that the lecturer couldn’t be heard. The light spray of rain coming in through the window fell on her face. Her hair started flying. She closed her eyes and smiled. In that moment, she suddenly knew why she loved that place so much. She couldn’t really explain it and there was nothing very unique about that place, but her heart was set there. From the minute she had started observing her surrounding – she had fallen head over heels in love with the city. She opened her eyes and continued to look out of the window.